Monday, March 4, 2013

Reflecting on my 6 year Cancerversary

Monday, February 4, 2013

Current mood:  reflective

This Friday, March 8, 2013 will be my 6 year cancerversary.

It feels like just yesterday, I was sitting in Dr. Lee's office going over my plan of attack. Remove the lump and 12 weeks of radiation. I walked out of her office like no big deal.  I can handle this, just a minor speed bump in my life. Then as the weeks went by and more tests happened and with my surgery results everything would change. The cancer had spread and now I needed a mastectomy and 8 rounds of chemo.

I remember her words, they are forever etched in my memory.   She told me there are 3 kinds of people when it comes to fighting cancer. One will walk out of the Dr's office in denial and stay there and do nothing. One will leave the Dr's office have a melt down and then fight as hell to survive. One will leave the Dr's office and fight like hell and then have their melt down. Which was I? I was the third. I left Dr. Lee's office that Saturday morning full of fight. I was going to attack this cancer and show it who was boss.

I did so much research on Breast Cancer, you could say I'm an expert. To this day I can recite my pathology report, the size of my tumor, the grade of my cancer and all the drugs that were pumped through my body. The sad thing is I'm not really sure I ever did have that melt down. Don't get me wrong I had minor melt downs along the way. I did my fair share of crying!

One thing I did do for sure was reflect on my 35 years and decided that it was time for a change. Cancer did teach me to chase my dreams, which led me to moving to NYC. I love NYC and had always wanted to work and live there. I thrive on the hustle and bustle! I loved the 3 years I lived there.

As my 6 year approaches, I'm starting to reflect again on my life and the things that make me happy and the unfortunate things that do not. Maybe it's time for a change again...

The thing in my life that makes me the happiest is being an Auntie to my amazing 2 year old Niece Kiersten. I am beyond thankful that I kicked cancer's ass and I'm able to watch this little girl grow up. We just recently had our first sleepover at my apartment. We had so much fun! There is nothing better than the sound of Auntie Jill coming from her mouth as she screeches to greet me with a hug when I go over for a visit. As I always tell her, she is Auntie's Favorite!

Also as my 6 year approaches, it's time to reflect on the negative in my life and how I'm going to change it. What frustrates me and what exactly can I do to change that...

It's sad to say but sometimes we have negative people in our lives and I know for me it may be time to close a few chapters or doors and leave room for some new and hopefully exciting doors to open.

Life is way too short to live with people that frustrate you or simply don't bring out the best in you. It's difficult but sometimes necessary to say good bye. I do believe that people come and go in our lives and everyone that we meet has a purpose in our lives. Some stay for a short period and other stay for years.

Continuing to live my life with NO REGRETS!....

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